Stage Fright (Day 28, although we are like 1 or 2 poems behind right now, NaPoWriMo 2015)

So we are pretty sure we’re like a poem or two behind this poetry month, but not to worry, tomorrow and Thursday will have at LEAST two poems a piece! That is definitely something to look forward to. Tonight’s piece is really just a reaction to some very good yet puzzling news, and for the better part of the day we have been processing it. Here is what’s been going on:

Staring into the huge room

with an untold number of faces,

it is too engaging trying to connect with an audience

that you have never before seen in your life.

Of course it is normal

to get startled, frightened, overcompensate and

tighten up in front of a crowd from time to time,

but one must ask themselves

if

they wish to continue to be in front of said stage,

The struggle up to this point has

made one familiar with the pain,

appreciative of the gains,

and understanding of being drained,

and that’s where I am right now.

I am drained,

depleted,

exhausted from a gulag of a place

that

dictates, and emanates hopelessness all around it.

But with this,

this is a successful parole hearing,

this is a

shot of redemption in the form of a letter

with a phrase so many people in my age range

long to hear and

bustle and struggle to gain.

You are accepted.

It is not about someone else accepting you as a person, per say

but it is

an establishment deciding that

you have the talents to improve and better not only your life

but on the whole,

you are on the cusp of impacting and changing society as well.

These white obelisks in the sky are not what we aim for, rather

it is the changing of what encompasses the institution

that enthralls and engages our attention and focus,

it is the institution recognizing it is not all knowing and

that it truly needs our help to improve the landscape

beyond its tattered and sheltered walls.

This is not a struggle of deciding if one should gain more tools

to build better places for our communities, for those who

have either not chosen or have not been granted such an opportunity,

No.

This is a struggle of determining if we are ready to invest in such a battle,

if one is focused, engaged, and committed enough to take such tools

being waved in front of our constantly working faces.

This is a struggle to get over the stage fright of failing,

every single soul who has sacrificed, aided, and abetted such a cause.

What will you do when the curtain rises?

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